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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/22890010">Support</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wolfcry22/pseuds/Wolfcry22'>Wolfcry22</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>The Exhausted Mind of Poe [7]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Star Wars - All Media Types</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Poe Dameron Has PTSD, Poe Dameron Hurts So Prettily, Poe Dameron Needs A Hug, Poe Dameron Whump, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Protective Poe Dameron, Support Group, The Resistance Era, Trauma</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-02-25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-03-10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-01 11:14:11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>5</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>7,679</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/22890010</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wolfcry22/pseuds/Wolfcry22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>After struggling with PTSD symptoms for a while, Finn finally urges Poe to be able to go to a support group for others that have experienced trauma as well.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Poe Dameron/Finn</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>The Exhausted Mind of Poe [7]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1605424</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>52</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Trying It Out</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>This was one of the hardest and the most enjoyable. There are some original characters in this one and I really enjoyed being able to write their individual personalities. They will be in a lot of stories yet to come so if you like them you’ll be able to read a lot more about them!</p><p>Warning for slight implied past sexual abuse</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Poe didn’t want to be there. Absolutely not. He would’ve rather been anywhere else. In fact, he would’ve rather been tortured by Kylo Ren again or sent on another mission. However, he had made a promise to Finn to at least try it. There were plenty of other Resistant fighters who had gone through trauma just like Poe had.</p><p>    “I can’t always relate to what you’re feeling,” Finn had pointed out to Poe the night before after another sleepless night thanks to Poe’s devastating flashbacks. “But, these people can. Please, just try it, for me.”</p><p>    That’s why Poe found himself in one of the bunkers at the far corner of the Resistance Base, standing in front of the door. He glanced up at a sign that was written in bold letters.</p><p>    TRAUMA SUPPORT GROUP MEETING AT 1800 HOURS</p><p>    Poe sucked in a heavy breath as he grasped the door and slowly swung it open. He stepped into a medium sized room with chairs arranged in a circle. There was a table with some sweets and finger food as well as pamphlets hanging on the wall. Poe made his way and gulped as he looked at them. He saw some of them were about nightmares, domestic abuse, and even some about sexual assault.</p><p>    “Mr. Dameron?”</p><p>    Poe nearly jumped when he heard someone say his name behind him. He spun around and saw a professional looking man in traditional Resistance attire. He was older than Poe, but not by much. His eyes were silver and he had a scar on his temple. He stuck out his hand toward Poe friendly. </p><p>    “Oh, just Poe, please,” Poe requested as he shook the man’s hand.</p><p>    The man nodded. “Very well, Poe. You can call me Dr. Firn. I’ll be the overseer of this group and just making sure everything goes smoothly. Is this your first time at a support group?”</p><p>    Poe set his jaw as he shuffled his weight from one foot to the other. “Um, yeah, I’ve never been to one. I didn’t even know we had them here,” he confessed as he lifted his hand to scratch at his right eyebrow.</p><p>    Dr. Firn smiled comfortingly as he led Poe over to the chairs as a group of people came in front one of the other doors. “They’re not wildly known, which I’m trying to change. There is strength in asking for help. Unfortunately, most Resistance members don’t see it that way. They’re too proud to come.”</p><p>    Poe nodded. He had certainly been one of those people who had been too proud to come. He wasn’t about to point out that he was only there because Finn made him. He was sure that Dr. Firn wouldn’t be overly excited to hear that.</p><p>    “Well, you can have a seat anywhere and once more people show up we’ll start,” explained Dr. Firn as he nodded to one of the chairs. He then drew forward and came over to the other group and spoke to them.</p><p>    Poe frowned as he reluctantly made his way over to one of the chairs. He sat down heavily and rubbed his hands up and down his thighs nervously. He could already feel his breathing become shallower and his heartbeat quicken. His stomach churned in nervousness as his eyes closed almost painfully. He lowered his head into his hands before rubbing his hands against the back of his neck. “Don’t panic. Don’t panic,” he repeated. He could feel his body tightening. “Don’t fucking panic.”</p><p>    He could hear footsteps and low murmuring as well as some laughter. Poe forced his head up as he noticed a total of seven people and Dr. Firn in the room. He didn’t know any of them by name, but he was sure that he recognized their faces. He thought that he had seen a few of them in the mess hall or walking the hallways. However, he wouldn’t have went up to any of them to speak.</p><p>    “Alright,” began Dr. Firn as he took his seat, which was three seats away from Poe. “Let’s get this started everyone. Please, take your seats.”</p><p>    The group quieted as they all took their seats. Poe tried to meet some of their gazes, but they seemed to be as nervous as he was. Poe decided it was best to look at Dr. Firn. </p><p>    “Okay, since we have a few new people we are all going to go around and introduce ourselves. I will go first. My name is Dr. Firn,” Dr. Firn introduced as he rested a hand on his chest. “Morry, would you like to go next?”</p><p>    The women who was beside Dr. Finn nodded. She wore a long black dress and her dark hair fell against her shoulders. She barely wore any makeup and yet she still seemed beautiful. She glanced up and forced a smile. “I am Morry. It’s nice to meet you all.” </p><p>    She looked to the man beside her. He had a thick beard and black hair. Poe knew that he was a pilot apart of the Silver Squadron. “I’m Jasp.” </p><p>    Next was a sullen looking women. She was wearing plain clothing and had her long brown hair in a ponytail with a few strands falling out. Her green eyes appeared haunted and when she spoke, she didn’t look up. “Mhina.”</p><p>    The Kel Dor beside Mhina spoke next. “Ri-Tun.”</p><p>    A Quarren was next. “Jub.”</p><p>    The last one, another humanoid male with longer brown hair and hazel eyes spoke next. “N-Naylo.”</p><p>    Poe realized that eyes were on him. He tried not to let his embarrassment show when he spoke. “Poe.” His voice came out a croak, but no one commented on it.</p><p>    Dr. Firn nodded. “Very good. Now, this is fairly informal for those that are new. I may ask some questions, but I’ll mostly allow all of you to lead the conversation. You can say how you’re doing, successes or troubles that you’ve had. I’ll let you all take the lead since you certainly know what you’re dong. Does that sound good to everyone?”</p><p>    There were a few nods before Jasp raised his hand. Dr. Firn nodded at him before the larger male looked up with a light in his eyes. “Last week I talked about not wanting to sleep without a shirt on at night because I didn’t want my wife to see all the burn marks.” He swallowed almost painfully. “I spoke to her about it and I slept for part the night without my shirt on two days ago.”</p><p>    A few of the other members of the group gave small claps while Morry beamed at him. “I’m so proud of you, Jasp! I told you that Lilia would understand.”</p><p>    “You were right, Morry. I just need to get better at telling her what I’m feeling,” Jasp replied as he instantly seemed to retreat back into himself.</p><p>    Dr. Firn smiled kindly to Jasp. “That’s really good, Jasp. Anyone else have any successes that they want to celebrate?When no one spoke up, he looked to Mhina. “What about you, Mhina? You were going to go on that date, right?”</p><p>    Mhina’s leg jiggled as she fought to answer. “I-It didn’t go well,” she stammered. She let out a small sniffle as she lifted her hand and rubbed a tear from her eyes. “We only lasted about fifteen minutes. H-He tried to touch my hand and I screamed at him not to. He called me a freak and walked out. I ate by myself.”</p><p>    There were a few gentle murmurs while Poe frowned. He wasn’t quite understanding what the big deal was. A guy had tried to hold her hand, so what?</p><p>    “It’s alright, Mhina. You don’t need to be ashamed of it. You have nothing to be sorry about,” reassured Dr. Firn while looking to the rest of the group. “Does anyone have any words of wisdom or encouragement from Mhina?”</p><p>    The Kel Dor, Ri-Tun, turned to Mhina with a gentle look in his eyes. “You were incredibly brave to actually go on the date. Anyone who isn’t patient enough to see your worth isn’t worth your time. I wasn’t able to even try to date again for years after what happened to me. You’re doing well, Mhina.”</p><p>    Mhina lifted her hand as a few more tears rolled down her cheek. “It doesn’t feel that way. I can’t walk down the halls and see a male coming toward me without tensing up. They look at me and I want to hide. I’m terrified and I can’t do anything about it. The thought of touch makes me want to cower in a corner and everyone treats me like some sort of freak. They make fun of me, even here. I just want to feel better.”</p><p>    Dr. Firn grasped a tissue box that was under his chair. He handed it to Morry before she handed it over to Mhina. Mhina took a few tissues out and dabbed it at her eyes. “These things take time. I know it doesn’t seem like it, but things will get better. Everyone here is here for you. We support each other. Is there anything that we can do for you?”</p><p>    “Yeah,” added Jub as he punched a fist against his other hand. “Just let me know who I have to beat up and I’ll do that too!”</p><p>    There was a low rumble of laughter. Dr. Firn waved him off. “I’m sure that Mhina appreciates that, Jub, but physical assault is probably not going to make things better,” he pointed out.</p><p>    Jub leaned forward and lifted his hand to his mouth to speak so that Dr. Firn couldn’t see him. “Just let me know if you change your mind,” he whispered.</p><p>    “Anyone else,” questioned Dr. Firn.</p><p>    Poe straightened with his eyes slightly knit in confusion. “What happened to make you scared of people, Mhina,” he asked.</p><p>    There was an almost strangled silence that surged through the room. Mhina’s gaze snapped up as she looked to Poe. Poe immediately knew that he had said something wrong when Mhina rose to her feet and darted from the room. He could hear her terrified sobbing as she rushed down the hallways of the bunker.</p><p>    “I’ll go see her,” reassured Morry as she rose to her feet and bustled in the direction Mhina had gone.</p><p>    Nayo looked over to Poe. “Way to go, dick!”</p><p>    Poe felt the hair on the back of his neck stand on end as he looked down. “I-I didn’t mean-“</p><p>    “We don’t come out and ask about everyone’s trauma like that, Poe. It’s one of our only rules, especially with someone like Mhina. This is a safe space for everyone in all of their trauma. We need to respect that,” Dr. Firn explained sternly.</p><p>    Shame washed over Poe as he lifted his hand and rubbed the back of his neck. “I’m sorry I didn’t realize. I’m new to this,” he hissed through gritted teeth.</p><p>    “We’ve all been there,” Jasp pointed out, seemingly more patient than anyone else. “Just make sure that you don’t do it again. Mhina will forgive you. She’s super kind and patient. She gets scared when she’s in here with males of any kind. If you’re patient with her then she’ll tell you her story. That’s just not the way to do it.”</p><p>    Poe hung his head. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to cause her any harm. I’m new to this.”</p><p>    “It’s alright,” Dr. Firn continued. “I think we should wrap it up for today. We will meet again next week.”</p><p>    Poe stood and shifted before leaving without another word. There was no way in hell he was going back there again.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. One More Try</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Poe comes back to Finn still reeling from the support group. Can Finn persuade him to give it another try?</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>One or two instances of strong language. This part deals with some heavier and more mature themes than the first chapter.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The door closed and Finn glanced up from the book on strategic analysis that he had been reading. “How was the support group?”  </p><p>    Poe shrugged out of his jacket and hung it up in the closet. “Fine,” he muttered dismissively. </p><p>    Finn titled his head as he watched Poe step out of his boots and was already starting to pull his shirt off as he made his way to the fresher. “That’s it? Just fine?”</p><p>    Poe rolled his eyes as he grasped his toothbrush and spread some paste on it before bringing it up to his mouth. He started to brush his teeth almost robotically. “Yeah.” He spat the toothpaste into the sink before washing out his mouth with water. “What else do you fucking want to hear?”</p><p>    Finn let out a heavy breath. He knew that engaging with Poe when he was this angry was never a good idea. Poe had been through a lot and getting angry would do neither of them any good. “Did you meet anyone nice? Did they give you any advice,” he continued.</p><p>    Poe splashed some water on his face and dried himself up with a towel. He stepped out of his pants so that he was only in his boxers and a tank top. He left his pants on the floor before making his way out of the bathroom. “It was fine, alright? I really don’t want to talk about it,” he grumbled as he slid into bed beside Finn.</p><p>    Finn set his book down as he tried to meet Poe’s gaze. “I don’t mean to pry. I just thought you may find something in common with the members there. After all, they have shared experiences with you that I don’t have,” he pointed out as he rested a hand on his chest.</p><p>    Poe grumbled to himself. “I’m not sure about ‘shared experiences’. They’re not like me at all. I don’t think I’m going to go back,” he huffed.</p><p>    Finn knew that he wasn’t going to get anything out of Poe at the moment. He sighed as he slumped down in the bed and motioned for Poe. “Then you don’t have to. It was just something to try.”</p><p>    Poe’s agitation started to simmer down. He sighed as he lowered down beside Finn. Finn wrapped his arms around Poe and buried his face into the back of Poe’s neck. Poe felt Finn’s strong arms around him and he couldn’t help thinking about Mhina and how she had been overwhelmed when someone had touched her hand. He had never felt that way with Finn. He knew that he hadn’t been through what Mhina had been through and he longed to hurt whoever had harmed her.</p><p>    “What are you thinking,” questioned Finn when he felt Poe stiffen. </p><p>    Poe sighed as he wriggled from Finn’s grasp. Finn drew slightly back as Poe rolled to face him so that they were almost nose to nose. “There was this girl, this women, there. Something had happened and she was terrified of men. She went out a date and someone touched her hand and she panicked. After she told the group that, I said something really insensitive to her during the meeting.”</p><p>    “I’m sure you didn’t mean to,” sympathized Finn.</p><p>    Poe slightly propped himself up on his elbow. “You’re missing the point. Someone here made her feel that way. How messed up is that? A Resistance fighter here made someone feel that way. Can you believe it?”</p><p>    Finn furrowed his brow. “I mean, I guess it doesn’t fully surprise me. These are the same fighters that have said horrible things about you. I know that you want to think that everyone in the Resistance is great and a lot of them are, but it’s just like anywhere else. They’re not all respectful.”</p><p>    Poe sighed as he slumped back down on the pillow, feeling the bed seem to mold around himself. “If you could’ve seen the look on her face. She was terrified, broken. I wish I could apologize to her.”</p><p>    “You could try,” Finn suggested.</p><p>    Poe bit his bottom lip before shaking his head. “That’s not a good idea. She’s terrified to pass a male in the hallway. I’m sure she wouldn’t take well to me coming anywhere near her.” He drew onto his back as he rubbed a hand down his face. “I just wish I could make that better for her.”</p><p>    “You did what you could. You didn’t mean what you said.” Finn shifted until he had his head rested against Poe’s chest. “Maybe you can work on making the Resistance safer for women like her. That could be how you apologize,” he guessed.</p><p>    Poe lowered his head and planted a kiss on Finn’s forehead. “You’re a genius, Finn!”</p><p>    Finn swatted him good-naturally. “I don’t know about that.” His jaws then parted in a heavy yawn. “Maybe we can discuss this more in the morning? I’m exhausted.”</p><p>    Poe could cur with that. “Okay.” With that he closed his eyes and, with Finn sleeping beside him, he managed to drift off. </p><p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p><p>    An electric jolt traveled up Poe’s spine from the electrode that they had thrust against him. He let out a cry of agony as his entire body went rigid. His back was gushing blood and his lip was split. Tears leaked from his eyes as he glanced up to see one of the guards standing over him. </p><p>    “Please,” Poe begged as blood and saliva dripped from his bottom lip and fell onto the ground.</p><p>    The guard’s face didn’t change. He grabbed the electrode again and thrust it against Poe’s back again, sending a jot through him and splitting his back open once again. He gasped as he suddenly fell from his kneeled position that he had been forced to keep.</p><p>    His back sagged against the wall and left a streak of blood in his wake. He glanced up at the guard as he stood directly over him. He prayed that the guard would walk away, leave him alone, and just let him lick his wounds on his own. </p><p>    Suddenly, the guard struck out a foot and it collided with Poe’s stomach. Poe lurched forward as the blow was enough to make his stomach revolt. He brought up strings of mucus since he hadn’t eaten anything since he had been captured four days ago. </p><p>    Poe glanced up as broken blood vessels showed in his eyes. He let out a strangled sob. “Please,” he cried once more.</p><p>    A foot suddenly came down on Poe’s face and everything went black.</p><p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p><p>    Poe awoke to someone grabbing his shoulder. He suddenly exploded upward and his fist collided with something hard and he felt a rush of blood against his hand. A strangled cry then sounded as Poe scrambled backwards.</p><p>    “Damnit,” cried a voice beside him.</p><p>    It took Poe a moment to realize who it was. “Finn,” he questioned in alarm.</p><p>    “Damnit,” Finn repeated.</p><p>    Poe reached over and turned on the lamp. Yellow light bathed the space to show Finn sitting with a hand under his nose as blood gushed from it. It seeped from his fingers and dripped onto his t-shirt as well as the sheets and showed no sign of stopping.</p><p>    Poe froze for a moment as he saw the blood. He could feel the scars seeming to burn in his back and the pain as another kick exploded against his stomach. He almost surged forward as he recalled the long nights in a cell with no food or water as pain made it almost impossible for him to focus on. He saw black spots in the corner of his vision as confusion rushed over him.</p><p>    “Poe,” Finn exclaimed as he kept one hand cupped under his face. “Poe!”</p><p>    Finn sighed when he saw that Poe had gone as white as a sheet. The troubled man had stumbled against the wall and it was clear that Poe wasn’t going to be able to help. Finn grunted as he pulled himself from the bed and darted into the fresher to try and stop the blood that was gushing from his nose.</p><p>    Poe began to sob as he brought both fists up to his temples as he slipped to the ground. Fresh tears flowed from his eyes as he brought up his knees to his chest as he almost rocked back and forth. He could still feel the pain against his back and the terror of knowing that a guard was watching over him, and at any moment, he could attack him for any reason. </p><p>    Poe wasn’t sure how long he had been sitting there when he felt another hand on his shoulder. He snapped his head up and the hand recoiled as Finn stumbled back fearfully, not wanting a repeat of his originally injury. “Woah, woah, it’s just me.”</p><p>    Poe blinked his eyes as he saw Finn hovering over him. There was dried blood crusted around Finn’s nostrils while some of it stained his shirt. There was worry in his eye as he looked to Poe. “Are you alright?”</p><p>    Poe looked away with his shoulders hunched. “I hurt you,” he choked out painfully. “I promised that I wouldn’t do that again.”</p><p>    “You didn’t mean to,” Finn reassured quickly before Poe could fall down that rabbit trail. “I shouldn’t have startled you. You were having a nightmare and there were better ways to pull you out of it than shake you.”</p><p>    Poe swung his head back as he looked up to Finn almost painfully. “You shouldn’t have to be fearful of how to wake me up. I shouldn’t have to be this fucking broken,” he spat as saliva collected on his bottom lip, fresh tears rolling down his cheeks. </p><p>    Finn nodded slowly. He let out a few heavy breaths before bringing himself beside Poe. He gave Poe some room as they sat nearly shoulder to shoulder. “I’m sure that Mhina feels the same way?”</p><p>    “What,” questioned Poe.</p><p>    Finn shrugged. “Well, you said that she freaked out when someone touched her hand, right? You did the same thing. You freaked out when I touched you. I would say that you and Mhina are pretty similar in that respect, don’t you think?”</p><p>    Poe shifted his eyes to glance up at Poe, his lips pressed into a thin line. “What are you getting at,” he murmured softly.</p><p>    “What I’m saying is, you wouldn’t be angry at Mhina for acting the way that she did, right?” He paused as Poe nodded slowly. “Then, you shouldn’t be angry at yourself for acting the same way.”</p><p>    Poe frowned when he realized what Finn had done. “That’s a pretty messed up trick you pulled,” he huffed as he wrapped his arms around himself tightly. “I didn’t like it.”</p><p>    “But, it got you to see a different point of view, didn’t it,” questioned Finn with his head titled. “Right?”</p><p>    Poe rolled his eyes before lifting the back of his hand to brush the tears aside. “Yeah, it did, but I still hurt you, Finn. I....” He trailed off as he lifted his fist, which was still covered in Finn’s blood. His hand shook in outrage at himself.</p><p>    Finn quickly lifted his hand and grasped Poe’s fist. Poe was forced to look into his eyes. “Look at me. You. Didn’t. Mean. To. I’m not angry. I mean, don’t make a habit out of it, but I’m not angry.”</p><p>    Poe’s top lip trembled as his emotions threatened him again. He managed to close his eyes as he slightly leaned forward while Finn continued to grip his hand. “I’m sorry,” he croaked once more.</p><p>    “It’s okay,” reassured Finn as he scooted over to Poe to close the distance between them. He allowed Poe to slump against him as he lowered down to plant a kiss on Poe’s forehead. “But, you can do one thing for me.”</p><p>    Poe nodded vigorously. “Anything.”</p><p>    “Go back to the group next week,” requested Finn softly. “Please, just one more time and see how it goes. I really feel like it can help you.” </p><p>    Poe really wasn’t in any position to argue, especially after he had busted Finn’s nose and left him to deal with it on his own. He couldn’t deny that the flashbacks and night terror were getting worse. While he wasn’t sure a support group was the answer, it was really the only one he had. With a heavy sigh, he nuzzled into Finn. “Okay, I’ll try again, but this will be the last time.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>This part was a little longer than the first one. It was a little harder to write this one than the first one, but it was powerful and enjoyable to write Poe and Finn interacting after such a hard time. Support groups can be difficult and I wanted to showcase that with Poe firsthand.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Standing Up</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Poe feels guilty for what happened between him and Mhina. A chance encounter may help Poe make things right.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Brief implied mention of past sexual assault. I tried to write it in a respectful way and I hope that it came across that way. This story is one of the tougher stories that I’ve had to write, but drawing from my own experiences made this story possible.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Poe looked down at his tray of food. He wasn’t sure that whatever sludge of liquid and solid in front of him could be considered an actual meal, but he wasn’t in any position to argue. He had told Finn he would go with BB-8 to get some food since he had barely eaten in the past two days. Now he was seriously regretting his decision.</p><p>    “Don’t you speak?”</p><p>    Poe suddenly looked up when he heard a harsh voice. He gazed across the mess hall to see the girl from the support group, Mhina, sitting by herself in a corner of the room. Two men were hovering around her and Poe recognized one as Stick and another as a mechanic named Switch. </p><p>    “Yeah, you always sit by yourself. Don’t you have any friends, or a boyfriend,” taunted Stick.</p><p>    Switch rolled his eyes. “She’s too pathetic. What do you say, sweets? Want to go out with me,” asked Switch with his teeth glinting in the artificial light. </p><p>    Mhina shook in fear with her eyes down until Stick shot out a hand and collided it with her tray. He thrust it aside and it hit the ground hard, splattering her food on the ground. Mhina yelped in terror as she lifted her hands over her ears.</p><p>    “Freak,” spat Stick.</p><p>    That did it for Poe. He stood with his muscles tensing in rage. He barged past BB-8 over to the two Resistant fighters. “Hey, what the hell do you think you’re doing,” he exclaimed. “Leave her alone!”</p><p>    Switch and Stick exchanged a glance. “And are you going to make us, General,” Switch taunted as he narrowed his eyes dangerously.</p><p>    Poe wasn’t one to stop down from a fight, ever. He set his jaw as he took a step forward with rage glistening in his eyes. He felt his hand close into a fist as he thought about how he could take on both men at the same time. However, one look at the panicked Mhina told hm that he had to think of her and not make things worse. He let out a deep breath before squaring himself back up to Switch. </p><p>    “We can do this the easy way or the hard way? Would you like a citation for harassing another Resistance member,” he questioned.</p><p>    Stick stretched out a hand and hit Switch’s shoulder. “It’s not worth it,” he muttered to his friend.</p><p>    Switch curled his lip angrily at Poe. He leaned closer so that Poe could smell his reeking breath. “You can have her, fuckup.” With that he turned and headed out with Stick following. Both of them snickered as they left with Poe glowering in their wake.</p><p>    “I’m not a fuckup,” he whispered to himself in an attempt to make himself believe it.</p><p>    He shook the anger from his body when he realized that he had something else more pressing to deal with. He turned to see Mhina still sitting at the table with her hands over her ears and tears rolling down her cheeks. She looked like she was trying to make herself as small as possible. Poe knew that feeling only too well.</p><p>    He started over to the table and Mhina’s head snapped up immediately. The panic in her gaze was unforgettable and her muscles seemed tense as if ready to spring at any moment. </p><p>    “Wait, wait,” requested Poe as he stretched out his hands in an almost pleading gesture. “I’m not going to hurt you, I promise. I just want to talk. Is that okay?”</p><p>    It seemed to take forever before Mhina could even bring herself to answer. “O-Okay,” she croaked so quietly that Poe hardly heard her. </p><p>    Poe nodded with a slight smile. He slowly came to sit across from her while making sure not to make any sudden movements. He looked down to the ground where Stick had thrown her food. “I could get you more if you like? You didn’t look like you had eaten much.”</p><p>    Mhina shook her head vigorously. “I wasn’t hungry,” she whimpered. “Dr. Firn just makes me come everyday so that he knows I’m eating.”</p><p>    Poe gave a slight smirk, thankful that Mhina couldn’t see him. “Sounds like my boyfriend. He sends me with a droid or he thinks I won’t eat,” he murmured.</p><p>    “You have a boyfriend,” questioned Mhina, still looking down.</p><p>    Poe nodded. “I do. His name is Finn. We’ve been dating for quite sometime now,” Poe explained with a rush of affection for the exStormtrooper.</p><p>    Mhina lowered one of her hands from her ears as she placed it on the table, followed by the other. She started to pick at her nails nervously. “Is he nice,” she asked.</p><p>    “Extremely nice! He’s patient, helpful, and a little stubborn. He needs to be all of those things to keep up with me,” Poe joked.</p><p>    Mhina grew silent and Poe wondered if he had somehow hurt her feelings. He had never spoken to anyone like Mhina before and after what had happened a couple days ago at the support group, he wasn’t sure if he really should be. However, while he had her there, he knew that he had to apologize or his conscious was going to forever terrorize him. “I wanted to say that I’m sorry for what happened at the group. I shouldn’t have asked you that question. I hadn’t slept and my mind is all over the place right now.”</p><p>    Mhina shifted fearfully. She picked at her nails even more before speaking. “It’s okay,” she murmured.</p><p>    “No, it’s not. It’s not okay. I was selfish and stupid.” Poe composed himself before he lashed out at her because of his own frustration. “Do those guys bother you often?”</p><p>    Mhina shrugged. “If they see me, then sometimes. The guy that I went on a date with, he’s Switch’s brother. I guess Switch thinks he can say stuff to me because I rejected his brother.”</p><p>    Poe would never understand the loyalty of siblings. Then again, he didn’t have any siblings. “That’s messed up. If they ever give you a hard time again, let me know. It won’t be tolerated here.”</p><p>    “Thanks,” rasped Mhina as her gaze shot up to Poe. She quickly looked back down in terror. “I-I’m sorry. I know it’s not polite to look down when you’re speaking with someone, but I have a hard time with eye contact.”</p><p>    Poe shook his head in surprise as he leaned back. “You definitely don’t have to apologize to me for that,” he pointed out quickly. “Or explain yourself at all to me. I know that you’ve been through something quite horrible and all I can do is wish that I could strangle whoever hurt you. I won’t ask for anything more than that. Just know that I’m here and I’ll try to do anything that I can to help.”</p><p>    Mhina was silent for a moment before pausing and letting out a shaky breath. “I wasn’t always this way. I can just remember things in my past and certain things trigger those memories.”</p><p>    Poe felt his heart break for her. He longed to help and he only knew of one thing that he could say. “I am a pilot here. I went on a lot of missions. A lot of failed missions, actually. I’ve been captured, tortured, and lost those that I love. I can’t handle fireworks or any loud sound. I wake up every night with awful nightmares and my boyfriend, Finn, is always there to pick up the pieces. I don’t know where I would be without him, honestly.”</p><p>    Mhina nodded in agreement, sighing heavily. “I’m sorry. It’s not fair what people have to go through,” she hissed bitterly. She rested her hand on the table. “It’s not fair.”</p><p>    Poe felt his shoulders slump. He looked over to her with a tiny smile. “Is it alright if I touch your hand, Mhina?” Mhina stiffened. “I’m not going to hurt you, I promise. If you don’t want me to, then I won’t.”</p><p>    Mhina managed the tiniest of nods and Poe was sure that he could’ve missed it. Poe felt a rush of apprehension as he stretched out a hand and grasped hers softly. He didn’t dare squeeze until she elicited more contact herself. Tears rolled down her face as she lifted her closed fist to her mouth to choke down the sobs. </p><p>    Poe longed to be able to comfort her better, but he knew that she couldn’t handle that much physical touch. He just gave her hand a reassuring squeeze. “I know that you’re going to get through this, Mhina. You’re strong and kind. You did not deserve what happened to you. If you need anything, I’m here. I’m probably not the best option, but I am here.”</p><p>    “It’s so lonely,” Mhina croaked.</p><p>    Poe’s head bowed. Finally, someone was able to relate to him. Finn tried to, he really did, but he couldn’t feel exactly what it was like. Although Mhina and him had gone through different trauma, they had both been through horrible things that no one should’ve went through. It bonded them in a special way. “I know it is, but we have each other and the group. We will get through this, I know that we will. We get through it because we have to.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Writing soft and protective Poe is one of my favorite things and there will be plenty more of that in this rest of this upcoming story.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Hope Is Stronger</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Poe goes back to the support group in an attempt to appease Finn and finds things that he didn’t expect.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>This is a lighter chapter to this story but much needed. You’ll get to see a little more of the other characters in the support group and get to know them a little bit better. This part was super enjoyable to write and definitely not as dark for once!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Poe found himself standing outside of the support group room once again. He had promised Finn that he would try it again and after seeing Mhina a few days ago, he had a renewed vigor and excitement about it. He just needed to remember not to put his foot in his mouth. He had made some sort of strides with Mhina and now he had to work even harder not to mess it up.</p><p>    He opened the door to find that most of the group was already there. In fact, the only one that was missing was Jasp. He could see Mhina already sitting down, not really listening to any of the other conversation going on around her. Whenever Jub’s voice would rise, she would immediately try and cower away, her hand grasping feebly at her thigh. Poe recognized it as a grounding technique. </p><p>    Finn makes me tap my foot to the beat of my favorite song when I get likes that. It looks like Mhina is still trying to convince herself that she’s in this room, Poe thought as he felt his feet unconsciously dragging him over in that direction.</p><p>    “Hey,” Poe whispered softly with a tiny hand wave. </p><p>    Mhina slightly looked up and managed a partial smile before tucking her hands under her legs. Poe was about to sit down two seat away from her when he heard her soft voice. “Y-You can sit beside me, if you want,” offered Mhina timidly. “I-I’d like it, you know, i-f you sat there.”</p><p>    Poe felt a rush of warmth toward her. He didn’t dare reach out and he kept his movements slow. He sat beside her and the two shared a knowing smile as the rest of the group with Dr. Firn in his same spot from last week.</p><p>    “Okay, everyone, before we start I’m sure that you’re wondering where Jasp is,” Dr. Firn began.</p><p>    Even though Poe hadn’t known the man well, from the one session that he had attended, he could tell how much Jasp was needed. He was large and yet friendly. Even Mhina hadn’t seem too fearful of him when he had sat a few seats away. It seemed like there was a gaping hole since he wasn’t there.</p><p>    Dr. Firn sighed as he clasped his hands together. “First, I want to tell you that he’s alright. However, he did suffer a relapse. His wife reached out to me early this morning to let me know. He’s going to be transported to another planet with more extensive resources than just what we have here.”</p><p>    There were a few murmurs of sadness, but no one seemed too surprised. Poe shifted a sideways glance at Morry, who was sitting on his other side. “Relapse,” he questioned.</p><p>    “Spice,” Morry replied.</p><p>    Poe suddenly felt sick. He used to be a spice runner in his youth. He certainly wasn’t proud of it, but it had paid the bills for the most part. Knowing that someone like Jasp had gone to spice instead of coping with his emotions made Poe feel shame rise up inside of him. He knew that he wasn’t the one that would’ve supplied the spice to him, but he had been one of the ones to traffic it so many years ago. Just the realization that he could’ve been supplying it to men like Jasp made him sick.</p><p>    “He will come back, I’m sure. We just need to be patient with him,” Dr. Firn murmured as he lifted a finger to brush it under his right eyebrow. “He will come back to us. Now, who would like to start with our successes or struggles this week?”</p><p>    Morry raised her hand as she leaned back in her chair and clicked her ankles together. Dr. Firn waved his hand to her. “Yeah, well, someone pissed me off and I didn’t break their skull open with the wrench I had in my hand. I’d say that’s a success.”</p><p>    Poe let out a nervous chuckle while Ri-Tun reached out and squeezed Morry’s shoulder. Morry laughed as she waved him off. “Yeah, yeah. I’ll have to make a conscious effort to do that again.”</p><p>    Dr. Firn nodded with a smile on his face. “That is a step in the right direction. What did you do when you got angry?”</p><p>    “Well, I just tapped one finger against my leg and tried to think of other names for the word ‘black’. Sounds stupid, but it worked,” Morry replied.</p><p>    Dr. Firn smiled. “Alright, good job. Anyone else? Success or struggles.”</p><p>    Naylo was next. He leaned forward with his arms wrapped around his midsection. “Kikka and I broke up,” he confessed gravely. He gave a shrug as a tear slipped down his face. “She couldn’t deal with all the night terrors and my depression. I mean, I couldn’t blame her. I wouldn’t want to deal with me either.”</p><p>    “No,” exclaimed Morry as she leaned forward and stomped both of her feet against the ground. “You’re a freaking catch, Naylo! No matter what you’re going through. You deserve the best! If Kikka can’t give that to you then so be it!”</p><p>    Naylo cautiously glanced up to Morry. He shifted uncomfortably. “Thanks, Morry, but I’m not so sure. There’s not many like Kikka who would be as patient with me as she was. I doubt I’ll find anyone like her.”</p><p>    Poe felt his mouth grow dry. He knew what Naylo was going through to a certain extent. He never thought anyone would love him until he had met Finn. He knew that he hadn’t made things easy on the exStormtrooper and yet Finn had stayed by him every step of the way. </p><p>    “What about you, Poe,” questioned Jub after a moment of silence. “We don’t know much about you. Single, married, taken, wishful?”</p><p>    Poe sat back as eyes fell on him. He urged his heart to stop pounding out of his chest. “Um, I’m in a relationship. My boyfriend, Finn, he’s stuck by me. I’m always waiting for him to leave, though. Goodness knows I haven’t made things easy for him.”</p><p>    “Those are the people that you need to grab onto,” Dr. Firn pointed out with a knowing nod. “Those that stay when we do everything in our power to chase them away are the most important people that we can come into contact with.”</p><p>    Poe nodded in agreement. “I am lucky.” He made a mental note to go home after the meeting and hug Finn tighter than he ever had before. He couldn’t afford to loose him.</p><p>    “We all need those that we can lean on. Whether that is family, romantic partners, friends, or even people in this group. You all have more in common than you think,” pointed out Dr. Firn as he motioned to the group around him. “You can lean on each other and support one another. Can anyone give me an example of this?”</p><p>    Mhina slowly lifted a shaky hand. Dr. Firn’s eyes widened in surprise. “Oh, yes, Mhina. Go ahead,” he told her quietly.</p><p>    “The other day, I was in the mess hall. These two guys came up and gave me a hard time. They pushed my food that was on my tray on the ground and were way too close. I was petrified,” Mhina croaked.</p><p>    Ri-Tun stood up and started to throw a fist into the air. “Show me who these people were and I will end them,” he exclaimed.</p><p>    Morry snorted as she stood up and grasped Ri-Tun’s shoulders. She forced him back down. “Sit down! You’re not helping anyone by loosing your cool!”</p><p>    Mhina glanced bashfully over to Ri-Tun. “Thanks, Ri-Tun, but it’s alright. Poe came and chased them off,” she explained.</p><p>    Eyes turned to Poe in surprise. Poe shrunk down in embarrassment. Jub then stood and slightly towered over the still sitting Poe. He suddenly stretched out his hand toward him. “You’re one of us now, Poe,” he announced as he shook Poe’s hand.</p><p>    “Yeah,” added Naylo, looking a bit better than previously. “When one of us in trouble we help each other out. You’ve proven that you’re willing to do that for one of our own.”</p><p>    Poe had never been more relieved and proud to be apart of a group of people before. A couple months ago, Poe would admit that he would’ve looked down on them. Some of them had deep rooted trauma that affected every aspect of their lives. It had destroyed their relationships and so many other things. And yet, he felt closer to them and wanted to be accepted by them more than any other group. He saw himself in them, even though he originally wouldn’t have wanted to admit it. They were broken and so was he. It may have been in different ways, but trauma is trauma. </p><p>    “Thanks, but it was nothing. Mhina’s the one who showed me patience and understanding. We should really learn from her,” he pointed out. </p><p>    Dr. Firn looked giddy with excitement. “This is probably one of the best groups I’ve had in a while. Now, we’re going to go around and talk about some practical ways to deal with triggers and what we can do to embrace them when they can’t be avoided. Trauma is deep, but hope is stronger.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I did my best to capture what it was like at an actual support group. Each one is run differently from one group to another, but this is what I would assume happened at a support group on the Resistance Base. A little scattered, but close knit nonetheless and very important in Poe’s life as you will see in other stories as well.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Checking In</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Poe is more than excited to tell Finn about the Support Group. Finn gets to see a glimmer of the man that he loved and thought that he lost.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Poe walked into his bedroom after he had gotten dinner with the support group. He saw that Finn was already sleeping, even though it had seemed that he had tried his best to stay awake. Poe couldn’t help but smile at how cute he looked with his mouth slightly open and hands pressed under his cheek.</p><p>    He walked up to the bed and sat down beside Finn. It slightly dipped as he stretched out a hand and gingerly traced it over Finn’s cheek. </p><p>    Finn’s eyes fluttered open before realizing that Poe was sitting beside him. “Poe,” he mumbled as he slightly arched his back in a stretch as he struggled to sit up. “I’m sorry. I swear that I just closed my eyes for one second and-“</p><p>    “It’s alright,” chided Poe as he lowered down and pressed his lips against Finn’s. Finn kissed him back with his eyes widening when they broke off. It had been a while since he was able to me intimate with Poe, or even kiss him like that. Poe certainly wasn’t one to initiate anymore unless it was a tiny peck. </p><p>    Finn gulped. “Is everything alright?”</p><p>    Poe nodded with a lightness to his demeanor. “It was a good group. We spoke about triggers and how to work through them if they’re not avoidable. Next week we are going to go over more grounding techniques.”</p><p>    There was a relief in Finn’s eyes. Any tiredness he felt immediately disappeared. “So, you’re enjoying it? Like you actually want to go back?”</p><p>    “I do,” Poe replied. He gulped heavily as he nodded vigorously. “I really, really do. I wasn’t so sure about it at first, but I really think that I could learn from them. I just want to be the best for you that I can.”</p><p>    Finn sat up right rest of the way and leaned forward. He pressed his forehead against Poe’s while resting a hand on the back of his neck, rubbing it fondly. “You need to be the best for yourself that you can be. I’ll follow your lead. Don’t worry about being anything that you feel that you have to be for me. Be who you need to be for you.”</p><p>    Poe smiled as he slightly tilted his head to kiss Finn. Finn didn’t hesitate to kiss back. “I’ll do my best,” Poe panted between kisses. “It just feels good to be getting somewhere.”</p><p>    Finn smiled as he broke off. “As much as I would love to continue this, I’m exhausted.” He lifted his hand and tapped Poe’s chest. “Maybe you could come to bed and tell me all about the history of an X-Wing. I know that that’ll put me right to sleep.”</p><p>    Poe couldn’t remember the last time that he had been this playful with Finn. He chuckled as he leaned down and kissed the tip of Finn’s nose. “I think that I can arrange that.”</p><p>    He stepped off of the bed and grabbed a change of clothes before disappearing into the fresher and turning on the shower. Finn heard the water streaming as he laid back with a smile on his face.</p><p>    Poe was far from cured, that much Finn knew. However, Finn finally thought that Poe had taken the first steps in the right direction. It was still be a struggle, that much he knew, but at least he could finally see a light at the end of the tunnel.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>This has been a great part of the series to write! Giving other characters that went through similar things than Poe and may react differently was a different experience to write for and I will continue to use these characters in stories to come.</p>
        </blockquote><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>A little bit of cliffhanger for this one. This will be a multipart story and there will be a little more development for the other characters in the support group. Each one is different, but they area related in their trauma and that will be something that will continue to be explored in later chapters.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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